Spaghetti noodles.
All straight and neat and tidy if left in the package.
All long and drapey and delicious if they have the opportunity to cook.
But once they’re at the edible stage, they become tangled and wrapped around each other. A mess to eat if you don’t wrap them around a fork or cut them into tiny pieces.
The thing is, some of us are at a loss as to how to use our utensils on the beautiful mess before us.
I am, of course, referring not to spaghetti, but to my brain.
Creativity is only shades away from madness.
Today I speak to those whose noodles are randomly entangled, (sometimes thrown at the wall to test their readiness), and to those who love these crazy souls.
1. Things do not bounce off of us. They join the bowl of noodles tossed together affecting every other piece. This is why we feel as deeply as we do even when we don’t want to. We can’t come away unscathed in some way.
2. We are easily distracted. It’s why we text rather than call, because it is our most efficient way to communicate without getting distracted. It’s why we prefer face to face contact – it gives our restless eyes a focal point. Outer goings-on become inner goings-on without our even knowing it.
3. We can’t turn our brains off. Ideas spawn and multiply and we can’t keep up. The mound of spaghetti grows and we often feel powerless to stop it, or separate it into chewable pieces.
4. Sitting still is hard. Our bodies seem to try and help the brain find release through busyness. It is futile and self-defeating. Still we try.
5. We forget things. Things get lost in our spaghetti brains. They are in there somewhere; we just can’t always retrieve them. Dates and places fail us. Directions? All I can say is, we greatly appreciate Siri…
6. We love deeply. Sometimes, we are told, too much. Is this possible?
7. We are passionate souls. It comes out of the mess through our creative endeavors, our emotions, our zest for life. But it can be intense for those around us whose spaghetti is a little less messy.
8. We can sometimes isolate. It’s not because we don’t want interaction, necessarily, but because we can’t take in any more input or keep out any more distractions. This will pass.
9. Sometimes we feel lonely. It looks as if everyone else manages their plates with ease, while we feel we are scooping up spills from overflowing bowls.
10. We are prone to depression and anxiety. Little of it has to do with our surroundings or our circumstances, and more to do with the noodles waging war with each other. The what-we-knows battling the what-ifs and what-could-be’s. Or maybe, more accurately, our surroundings and circumstances initiate the internal fight between these inner thoughts. ( See all of the above. 🙂 )
The list goes on, but I’m too distracted with the rest of my day to bore you with more. 🙂
My encouragement to all of you, those with the same ailment, and those who are trying to understand them, is that this agony brings with it strange depth and beauty. God shares the creative heart and understands our dilemma. He joins us in that mess and reveals Himself in ways our minds can grab onto and integrate into and flavor every mixed up noodle in our brain.
To those of you who so patiently love us, we are sorry for the frustration, the misunderstanding, the randomness we bring to the table.
Though we can make a mess, we are desperately trying to use our utensils with a little more finesse…:-)
