I’ve got some processing to do.

And I thought I’d do it “out loud”, here.

There are many reasons:

1.  I’m still getting my head around what happened this morning.

2.  I want to document what happened so that I don’t forget.

3.  I want to publicly thank Jesus for His intimate love, shown in very specific answers to prayer.

But there are reasons why I hesitate to post this experience as well:

1.  It thrilled but slightly terrified me.

2.  I know that there will be people who are, at the very least, skeptical.

3.  I am overwhelmed a bit by the enormity of the message of the experience.

Clear as mud?

Okay.  I will explain as best I can and work through it in my heart and mind as I process it here.

Here goes….

We went to the new church that we tried last week.  With the exception of one couple that we met there a week ago, we knew no one.  We walked in a few minutes before the service started and easily found a seat.  As the music began, the room started to fill. A young gal (probably the age of one of my girls, in her 20’s) sat down next to me.  The worship music was great (I always lose myself in the music) and every so often I could hear an underlying almost-whisper coming from this young woman.  I’m not certain, but it sounded like hebrew (she was a California blond) and was definitely an example of speaking in tongues.

This is not a part of my usual worship experience, but I have been to worship services with friends where this takes place.  This is not a church where this would normally go on.  In other situations, I have found that when someone speaks in tongues (this is only my personal experience) it can be very distracting and uncomfortable for anyone not familiar.

Today was not like that at all.  It was, like I said, a soft whispering, followed by a soothing, heartfelt sighing.  As if this girl was quietly verbalizing her immense, intimate love for Jesus.  As I sat by her, each grateful sigh felt like a sweet, spiritual blanket of peace being draped over me. I don’t know how else to explain it. By the end of the service, tears were rolling down my cheeks as the last song was a direct correlation to the post I wrote this morning.

Probably about 3/4 of the way through the service, this young woman leaned over and touched me on the arm.  This complete stranger said to me, “Jesus has been telling me throughout the service that He has something He wants me to tell you. If you’d like, I will share it with you after service.”

Normally, I would be skeptical.  I had never had a conversation with this girl.  She didn’t know me from Adam.  On any other day my guard would be up.  I have too often heard people claim that they “have a word from God” only to hear something so generic that it’s anyone’s guess if it actually was.

But as we sang the last song, tears streaming down my face, I prayed that Jesus would let me know if this was truly from Him.  And that if it was, no matter what it was, I would listen and obey if need be.  I wasn’t afraid.  There we no red flags of warning.  I just asked that He would make it obvious if this girl’s words were truly from Him.

Now what I haven’t told you is that this weekend, even this morning, I prayed very boldly about some extremely specific things.  There was a specific request for direction,  a burden on my heart that would not ease up,  and a specific question that I asked in my heart, not even yet directly as a prayer, but more of a nagging doubt that was harassing  my thoughts.  I prayed that God would meet me in a way beyond my understanding to bring me peace on each of those fronts.  To be honest, when He graces me with those kinds of occurrences, they are generally not within the confines of the church building.  God thinks way outside that box.  But today He surprised, no shocked, even me.

The service was over and everyone was walking out.  This sweet girl looked me in the eye and began telling me the message she had for me.  So specific in each of those requests that it made my head spin.  She held me in her arms, this girl half my age, and whispered Jesus answers to the questions she’d never heard me utter.  Things that there is no way she could know about me without my telling her.

I heard Jesus, not in her voice, but in her words.  Words of deep encouragement, of direction, of comfort.  More confirmation of hints I had already begun to hear before today.

She even mentioned my writing.  How on earth would she know I was a writer?  I hadn’t even taken notes in the sermon.

She spoke as to what my ministry has been thus far and what it will (?) be.  That terrified me the most.  Because I don’t know exactly how or when that will happen.  It scares me to even write about it because the thought is too large for my small mind.  One day at a time.  One tiny step of faith at a time.

This sweet woman was only at this church for a day, here for just the weekend to visit a friend.  She “just happened” to go to the same service as me, to sit in the seat next to me, and then to miraculously speak Jesus’ words to me that she had no context for but that I so needed.

I told you it was crazy.  And I don’t feel like this post is capturing just how crazy amazing it really was.  All I know is that Jesus answered my prayers through a 20 something stranger today.  And all I could do as she whispered in my ear was whisper back through my tears, “Thank you, Jesus.  Thank you, Jesus.  Thank you, Jesus.”

I have no idea how you’ll feel about what I experienced today.  I don’t know what I’d think if you told me the same thing.  But I know what I know and that’s this:  My Jesus loves me more than I can fathom.  He forgives me more than I can conceive.  And He delights in me and has plans for me beyond my comprehension.  And He feels the same for you, too.

Ask and receive.  Seek and find.  Knock and then watch the door open.

Thanks for letting me process “out loud”.  God is just so incredibly good to His babies…

Matthew 7:7 – Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

James 1:5 – If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Ephesians 3:20 – Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,