That’s what I am and that’s what happened to me today… sigh…
I came home this afternoon to check my email. Seemed like an easy enough task. Except that it wasn’t.
A got a note that said that “unusual activity” was found in my account and that they were concerned for the security of my email address, so required me to change my password.
Again, it seemed to be a simple enough request. Except that it wasn’t.
I answered the security questions wrong. The question? What was your first pet?
Once more, a simple question. Except that it wasn’t.
I answered from Mark’s perspective, thinking that the account was made under his name. I named every pet that I knew that he’d had from childhood all the way through our current dogs as a family. No go every time.
What I failed to remember was that several years ago I had had to change my password also and had used my own security questions. They were asking for MY first dog’s name. Too late. I had already used up all my guesses and my time was up. The message told me that I would now have to wait 24 hours before trying again.
Unless…..I called the AOL number listed.
I should have seen the pattern, but once again, I thought that this would be easy. Except that it wasn’t.
After the phone rang several times, I was greeted by a message that told me that the next available operator would be with me as soon as possible. They then informed me that the wait would be at least 30 minutes, but to stay on the line.
Sitting on hold can’t be that hard. Should have been a slam dunk. Except that it wasn’t.
The background music that I listened to for the next 45 plus minutes was a nightmarish version of 70’s elevator music – never completing a full song, but playing the five or so notes over and over again in a happy-go-lucky, irritating way. Every 10 seconds or so there would be a gap in the music and I was sure that my representative was ready to serve me. Except that she wasn’t.
I was in that strange place between laughter over the ridiculous situation and tears of frustration. And then it happened. The music stopped and the phone rang.
Finally. I was going to get this problem solved and get back to checking my email. All I had to do was answer the ring. Just a routine and mindless task. Except that it wasn’t.
The woman who answered my eager “hello?” had the heaviest accent that I have heard in possibly my whole life. The next fifteen minutes consisted of her telling me asking me things and me saying, “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” She went through my name, first and last. Asked if I had a nickname. I couldn’t think of one. (Do I have one?) And then she asked the all too familiar question that will haunt me for the rest of my life. “What was the name of your first pet?”
I hate to be predictable, but this, too, should have been the easiest of tasks. Except that it wasn’t.
I named every dog that I ever remembered having, starting with what I thought was the first. Doxy. Nope. I named dog after dog. Apparently, over the years, I’ve lost track of the order of my pets. I was beginning to panic, sure that she thought I was some kind of con man trying to get into some poor woman’s account.
And then it came to me. The very last name I said. Jasper. I don’t know if he really WAS my first dog or not, but the lady with the heavy accent seemed to like my answer and I sighed a huge sigh of relief.
Over the course of the next 20 minutes she babbled on about things I will never know. I think I may have signed up for something that is supposed to protect me from this in the future. I’m not sure. I didn’t understand most of the conversation. But I didn’t care. All I knew was that I had a new password and that life could go back to normal again.
I hung up the phone and felt 20 pounds lighter and 20 years younger.
I went to my account, typed in my new password and thought, it’s so nice to so easily go in and check my mail. Except that it wasn’t.
Many of you got an email from me while my account was hacked. I tried to respond to most of you personally. But to any of you whom I missed or who didn’t tell me you got a bogus email from me, I apologize. I don’t know what was in it and I probably don’t want to know. Thanks for your understanding and patience. Which is more than I can say of myself during the past two hours of my life 🙂
