Psalm 126 – The Message
“It seemed like a dream, too good to be true,
when God returned Zion’s exiles.
We laughed, we sang,
we couldn’t believe our good fortune.
We were the talk of the nations—
“God was wonderful to them!”
God was wonderful to us;
we are one happy people.
And now, God, do it again—
bring rains to our drought-stricken lives
So those who planted their crops in despair
will shout hurrahs at the harvest,
So those who went off with heavy hearts
will come home laughing, with armloads of blessing.”
Last week my family celebrated the one year anniversary of a specific event in our lives.
Actually, we celebrated (and continue to celebrate) what has happened happened SINCE that event. My heart is completely overwhelmed with thankfulness! My words can’t do justice to the joy and gratitude that wells up into my throat and oozes out through my eyes. But this is my attempt.
Because I want you to be able to have a similar celebration of your own. A personal miracle of healing that will take your breath away.
It didn’t start so happy.
A year ago I literally crumbled to my knees on my brand new kitchen floor in a puddle of tears. Life had dealt us something beyond our control. The second shoe had dropped. An event that we didn’t see coming, but strangely had almost anticipated for a very long time.
You know what I mean. That bottom that you had hoped would never actually happen, but always feared it would. That place where, unless you finally get to it, nothing is going to change and healing can’ begin.
The other day I ran across a journal I began when that day hit for me. A desperate heart crying out to God.
“Is this bottom yet?” “I have never felt so weak, so unsure…extreme fatigue..not a clue what to do next”
These were the types of phrases that peppered two pages of scribbled, raw emotion.
The entry ended with the words: “LET THE HEALING BEGIN.” A begging plea for some sort of miracle.
I had no idea what was ahead. My eyes and mind foggy with tears and fears, I could barely summon enough strength to put one foot in front of the other on the path I found myself on.
All I could do was pray. With my family. With friends. Through the tears and the doubt. In spite of the weariness of my soul and the weakness of my body, mind and spirit.
I couldn’t envision even two steps ahead of myself.
What I couldn’t see was that God was already working on the healing. Long before I could recognize it, He was working so deeply, so intimately, with such perfect detail on areas I didn’t even know were broken, in ways that over the course of the next 12 months would become so obvious and clear.
My loving Father God was putting things into place at just the right time.
He had, in His sovereignty, placed a stranger in my life on the very day that my world had fallen apart. I could never have anticipated or planned it. This stranger, who took me in at my worst, became a trusted confidante. A counselor who worked as God’s specific tool of choice to draw things out of me, the good, the bad and the very ugly.
Shame, grief, dysfunctional thinking were brought to the surface,
I couldn’t control my circumstance, but I could find healing, even in the midst of it. Little by little.
The past twelve months have looked like hard introspection, hard choices and hard work. They have been accompanied by intensive prayer, deep interactions and consistent surrender to my Father who knows, who loves and who comforts beyond reason or measure.
He would work just as intimately in the things that I couldn’t control, in others who were also impacted by that event.
His hands were ready and able to catch everything and everyone that I released into His care.
I could never have foreseen or even dreamed of the beautiful work that God has done in the span of a year.
It started with my brokenness and has ended with His beauty.
This morning when I read Psalm 126, I wanted to shout it loud enough for everyone to hear:
“God was wonderful to us; we are one happy people!”
God has done great things for me. For my precious family. For those who have been part of our story.
Because healing stretches beyond the self and always extends to the others in our lives.
But I don’t want to stop with just our personal declaration of God’s healing. I want everyone to know this healing. I want to continue with the next verse:
And now, God, do it again—
bring rains to our drought-stricken lives
So those who planted their crops in despair
will shout hurrahs at the harvest,
So those who went off with heavy hearts
will come home laughing, with armloads of blessing
This is my prayer for you, dear friend.
Please, God. Do it again…
xoxoxo
j
I am so incredibly proud of you Jana – you are such an inspiration to me and to so many others around you. Your friendship has deeply blessed my life so many times and especially in the last year. Love you, my dear friend!
Thank you, Tracy. The blessing goes both ways, for sure! You have been such a source of comfort and encouragement this year and I’m so deeply grateful for a friendship that has only gotten richer after 40+ years! Love you, friend!
xoxoxo
Praise God for His loving arms wrapped around you. What a great year of new beginnings and healing
Love you so, friend. You have been there with me every step of the way in all of the incredible twists and turns of each of our lives for almost 30 years! I am grateful every single day.
xoxoxo
j
Thank you for sharing your story Jana. I started out this new year finding out I have breast cancer, luckily a very treatable form but still alot of what you said really resonates with where my thoughts are now. I especially love your final thought about healing extending beyond ourselves and reaching out to others. My prayer since I found out my diagnosis has not been that God would heal me but rather that God would use me and my illness in whatever way He chooses to help others.
Oh MariAnne! I just saw this! I’m so sorry for your battle with cancer but so thankful with you that it is treatable. God will undoubtedly use your story to help others who are going through something similar or as emotionally difficult. He will bring along opportunities and people that will surprise you in every way! So glad that you are trusting Him to do just that and to use the ripple effect of your healing to bring soul healing to others. xoxoxo