I’m an “Innie” not an “Outie”. When it comes to my belly button, I consider that a good thing. When it comes to other things, it can be a real frustration….
There are many things inside of me that don’t look the same when they come out –
1. My singing voice. In my heart and mind, I belt it out like Kim Walker. The passion is there, the will. But somehow it gets caught or lost on the way out and I sound like, well, NOT Kim Walker.
2. My running. My mind is way ahead of my body. In my mind I run like the wind, graceful like a gazelle. Free and effortless. In real life? I have to remind my legs to take the next step and am stuck with a 10 minute mile pace. (This has been a recurrent bad dream of mine since sixth grade at an unfortunate track meet….)
3. My ability to stay focused. All of the creative ideas in my head need to be categorized and prioritized, but instead they swim, free-style, around in my head and come out randomly in and out of order. In my heart, they are organized and manageable. In reality, not so much…
The list goes on and on. The passions inside completely overshadow the actual ability that manifests itself. And I guess that’s okay. If I was able to do things at the level that my heart feels them, I would be so amazing that my head would get huge and probably wobble right off of my body. No, it’s better to be in the humble place of slight (okay, sometimes great) frustration. Keeps my eyes on Jesus, to fill in all the gaps for me.
Jesus understands that type of frustration. He left heaven and all glory and endless power to come to a broken world as a human. A baby, no less. Omniscience within the confinement of a mortal body. And while my frustration is beyond my control, His humility was His choice. One of us. For us.
One amazing day when I get to heaven, I will leave the restrictions of this body behind and will realize my full potential to love and worship and praise. And I will, for the first time, see Jesus in all His glory, unrestrained, arms open wide. This One whom I have loved with all of my limited heart and mind, I will know fully and completely. All of me with all of Him.
And on that day, I WILL sing like Kim Walker and will run like a gazelle straight into His arms….and all of my “innies” will become “outies”…
1 Corinthians 13:12 – Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
